It seems as though I’ve lost myself again
Walking through the darkness of the day
I’m not sure how, I’m not sure when,
I didn’t know if I’ll ever find my way

The world has a different kind of glow
So visceral, savage, with sadness at it’s core 
And as I stare into the darkness I think I know
My eyes tear up again, feeling almost sore

My skin is wrapped to tightly around
A body shaped like madness in the night
With vengeance, I try to tear it to the ground
In hopes that through the pain I’ll win the fight

The winter sky, it taunts me
With it’s grey muted light
No sunshine here for me to see
Not through the day nor in the night.

I used to dream of better days
Ones where I could feel and smile
And know myself in every way
And maybe I could stay a while.

But here I sit alone with my own demon foes
Filing up my mind, heart and soul
With unforgiving anguish, pain and woe
With taunts and laughs taking their toll.

My body aches and shakes through the night
And well into the waking hours
My mind screams you are alone, you cannot fight
Despite the dozens trying to give me safety and cover

I do not know where I am going anymore
I thought I had a solid plan
I cannot find reasons to remain, I’ve lost the war
I’m no more than a broken man.

I used to think all broken things can be mended
Repaired back into a useful state
But I’m afraid such powers aren’t within me hosted
The time has come to simply accept my fate.

Should you awaken to a day and find
That I’m no longer with you here
Remember as you search for meaning in your mind
That no amount of crying can make me reappear

That’s ok though, really. It’s true
The world never needed me at all
And though my absence might be felt by a select few
In chilly months of fall

The world will keep on spinning
Never sensing any kind of loss
It really is amazing
How little human life can cost.

I can’t relate to those old songs

The ones that helped us get to here

I’ve committed many wrongs

I’ve proven that life’s not fair.

Then all at once they go down

The guitar sustains a single note

And all at once i lose my frown

I hear the words the singer wrote

The spotlight shines upon the stage

The band kicks off a familiar tune

My heart soars no room for rage

That old chorus comes up soon

Bridge

So fill your lungs and join the song

It’s calling out just for you

Come on sing, sing along

I know you can feel it too

Chorus

Sing out for the lonely ones

Just looking for a friend

Sing out for the lovers

May their bliss never end

Sing out for the broken

Their fractures we can mend

Sing out for each other

And together we shall stand.

 

The band played on their second verse

The crowd began to cheer

Another chorus soon to burst

A new future is coming near

And while the solo is in the air

My eyes upon my soul

It doesn’t matter if life’s not fair

To fix that is our goal.

So we stand together while they play

And sing with them a while

Feeling every word they say

We great you with a smile.

The world is full of darkness

Full of passion, Full of pain

The world is full treason

Lack of reason, lies remain

The world is full of sunshine

Clouds obscure the feeble heat

The world is full of promises

Broken all, until you’re beat

So you keep marching, marching

On the battle field, alone

But look you to your left and look you to your right,

We are there beside you, we are the riders of the night.

While there’s breath within our lungs and a beat within our hearts,

We’ll ride beside you, we are the riders of the night.

Friendship is not a fable told to children in their sleep.

It’s a promise that we give you. It’s a promise that we’ll keep.

No foe today, no fight tomorrow will break us of our vow

We’re one for all and all for one until our final bow.

So though you might feel like you keep marching

On the battle field alone,

Just look you to your left and look you to your right,

We are there beside you, we are the riders of the night.

Get out of my mind and out of my soul

we parted ways many days ago

You called me names,

said I never cared

Now your dancing happy with another man

I’m making my way,

I’m down over here

Crying my tears,

I never thought were there

We didn’t do much time

with the things that we did

Running around with our secrets well hid

I tried to make an honest gal out of you

But hiding behind curtains

is all that you do.

Now don’t start hating me honey,

I know you liked the chase,

the paddles the ropes

and that special place

You wanted every second

that I could provide.

Look. I’m sorry honey

I couldn’t be what you want

Your 24/7 bitch to control.

I was willing to give you

all my heart and my soul

You only saw the chance

for a single goal

The poly life ain’t for ya,

you couldn’t balance the tide

Looking for something

no one tried to hide

And when you discovered

I wasn’t gonna bend or break

You found another player

to whip into shape.

I wish you the best,

no really I do

I hope he provides you

the same headaches you knew

Cuz the issues we have

weren’t caused by no man

But are the product

of your internal mayhem.

Until you find how

to tame your storm

There ain’t a single man

who will keep you warm.

Night after night

season after fight

you’ll find the rain is coming down

your smiles turn to frowns

cus nothing will keep you bright

until you learn to set your own light.

 

I’m a loser, I’m a freak
im a loner, im a geek.
Im a mystery in space
not good looking in the face
Just an ant beneath your feet.
a useless thing, a pile of peat.
at least thats what you see.
but have you ever gazed into my eyes?
ever cracked though the disguise?
did you try to understand
that I am no more than a man.
Just a man, looking for way
to keep his friends, to make them stay?
they leave. everyone always leaves you know.
sure I  bend and break for all of you,
and you abuse it through and through.
And I ask for little in return
just here and there give me a turn?
perhaps you’ll find there’s more to me
than you ever dared to see.
but for now the secrets shall remain
after all, i am Insane.

I am
I am an artist, and a writer,
and while my words may ne’er be tighter,
I am a man, and lover still,
and we shall never have our fill.
I am demolished, I am destroyed
by every method you employed.
I am a shadow in the night,
I am you darkness I’m your fright.
I am the voice that whispers in your ear
when madness comes and all is clear.
I am your weakness, I’m your strength,
through the fire, you’ll make the length.
I am your sword, I am you shield,
through the water and the field.
I am your tactics, first response,
And I am your second chance.
I am a question, I’m a light
I’m an answer and your might.
But above and despite all else,
I am here.
I am your friend.
and this shall last
to the very end.

(C) Daniel G. Allen May 21, 2012

Staring at the ceiling,
Counting passing stars,
I never thought my numbers
Would ever get that far.
Yet I keep on counting,
Hoping for the best.
All I really wanted,
Was some peaceful rest.
Alas! The world thought it funny
That a simple man like I
Should have any peace at all
Till the day I’ll die.
So my number ‘s rising
And my day grow dim
It’s not too far, the day
I’ll take my final swim.

I’m just a shadow of the man I was before

Lost my armor, left my honor at the door.

There’s nothing left, I’ve rotted to the core

The rain beats down, I’ll drown and burn forever more.

Living on this spinning sphere
Haven’t found our escape
Seeking daily to change our lives,
Somehow to alter our fate
Tangential to every plan there is
The reality of whats expected
And through every action we try to take,
There’s always so much to be protected..

So much of what is in our lives
Depend on gods and heavens
But honor, love and our fate
But honor, love and our fate
Are ours to make or break
They’re ours to make or break

No matter what our lives may throw
We have to keep on pushing
To create an honest truth at home
Is the only  mission
The roads ahead may be rough
The coming turns are dimming
Don’t compromise on who we are
Our strength is only the beginning